Monday, September 02, 2013

Salesbug

Als Gregor Samsa eines Morgens aus unruhigen Träumen erwachte, fand er sich in seinem Bett zu einem ungeheueren Ungeziefer verwandelt.

“One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in his bed he had been changed into a monstrous bug.” 

"One morning, as Gregor Samsa was waking up from anxious dreams, he discovered that in bed he had been changed into a monstrous verminous bug."

“As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect.”

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a gigantic insect-like creature." 

"As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning after disturbing dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into an enormous cockroach." 

"As Gregor Samsa woke one morning from uneasy dreams, he found himself in bed, transformed into a horrible vermin."

"One morning, when Gregor Samsa woke from troubled dreams, he found himself transformed in his bed into a horrible vermin." 

"When Gregor Samsa woke up one morning from unsettling dreams, he found himself changed in his bed into a monstrous vermin."

“As Gregor Samsa awoke from unsettling dreams one morning, he found himself transformed in his bed into a monstrous vermin.” 


3 comments:

Andrew Shields said...

A nice spin of versions. All yours?

I lean toward simple (woke up) instead of continuous (was waking up).

Unruhig is a subtle problem; I like "restless," because it, too, gives the dreams a somewhat odd modifier.

One thing your versions emphasize is that the last word has to be the translation of Ungeziefer, even if that means that "in his bed" ends up in a somewhat odd position in the sentence.

But the latter point implies that it's best to translate the main clause in such a way that "in his bed" doesn't end up in an odd position. That points toward the versions with "found himself in bed," which may be a touch too close to the German, but it gets "in his bed" into the right position.

SarahJane said...

Only one is mine, and not that I'm fond of it (6th one). I thought it would be fun to see how this sentence (meta)morphs into English. I found all these in different translations (mine excepted).

I found it especially interesting because it's not until the 2nd sentence in the original German that you find out he's a beetle, perhaps a roach.

Besides all the possible things he finds himself to be, I like how "unruhig" comes through. "Restless" is a good choice, too. Doesn't seem anyone has gone there. I do lean towards "uneasy."

"Was waking up" seems truly wrong. No reason for that.

SarahJane said...

He could also "emerge from uneasy dreams." That might work, considering "aus."

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