Monday, August 07, 2006


Time to report that my hair has reached that stage. You know, it has gone to certain lengths. Already a month ago it was screaming “Cut me! Insert scissors!” Now it just says Sad. It just says Slump, and No goddamned way! It has birthed a new beast: the leonine mouse. I’m not sure yet if that’s its name... maybe mousoline lion?

The truth is I don’t believe in the good haircut. The truth is I didn’t have the money before vacation to go through with it. When I went to cheapo, a sign said “closed for renovation” with the dubious caveat of “for YOU, valued customer.” How can it be closed for ME when I am standing at the door? Before I began looking like a reject weeping at the window of a darkened shop, I scurried off. This, I suspect, is when the mouse quality took root.

My hair also says Defeat. It says Bring the fingers. Mostly it speaks an unknown language.

My hair is not long it is not short. My hair is not brown it is not blonde. My bangs hang as notbangs. My hair wants to ponytail but won’t. Neither will it do pigtails, usually reserved for moments of hilarity. When I attempt the ponytail, two wispy quotation marks enclose the nape of my neck. As if to say Kick me.


Anonymous said...

Hi Sarah,

Welcome back from vacation. Hope it was worth it.

I'd love to see the poem this entry generates. Be sure and let me know if you write one.


michi said...


welcome back!


kate5kiwis said...

try to resist the impulse to go to cheapo. nasty. save up for two weeks and go to chic.
(in the interim, try a hat??)

SarahJane said...

Hi. Johanna, nice to see you. Don't think this'll be a poem. May have to wait until the suffering is over.

nice to be back. you've got me dangerously close to a mausoleum.

Hi kate,
i'm going with bushy at the moment. a straw hat did help on the beach, but they didn't seem to appreciate it at the office.


michi said...

this is as close to a mausoleum as you'll get. for a while, at least. :)

Bob Hoeppner said...

Welcome back. Good to see you obsessing over the important things!

Shelley said...

Welcome home; I missed you!

I am one of the few people I know who likes my hair as is.

Which probably doesn't help your situation any.

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